It was billed "Pitchslap V Regulators". It should have been billed " Pitchslap V Regulators V Toto V That F*#KING Umpire". All is not well in Matraville when one over hears an umpire pleading with managment to not have to ump the next match because the team are whingers. And that team was us. Not a good start. Next, some of the most dubious calls on run outs, stumpings, ball control , wides, no-balls, net scores.....oh. no more please. You get my drift. I'd hate to whinge. Anyway Umpy, good match. You did your best.
It appears after having heard the drums echo in the night, Slapper Knicky Sixx went to bless the rains down in Africa. Well, Enmore at least. He took the 4.30 flight and went searching for some old forgotten words. Maybe for some ancient melodies? " It's not gonna take alot to take you away from me " I said . " There's nothing that 8 men or more could ever do?", I pleaded. But as sure as Kilamanjero rises like an empress over the Serenghetti, Sixx was going. OK. Well, hurry boy it's waiting there for you.
The challenge was set. &Keano and The Hate got the ball rolling nicely early on. A solid Knock from both Slappers saw the total fly to 43, a mere 3 runs short of Slap Honours. B.Baggins and Myself continued on an upward trend, ever ever so slightly. Newcomer Ring -in Tim and gLOVE made sure the game would remain competitive, for the time being anyway. Whilst Masterclass finally found form and the back net in a stunning partnership with debutant Ring-in SLeM. The pair smashing the yellow pill all around the park. A classy total of 71 saw them just 5 runs short of Slap Honours. With a grand total of 139 we then took to the field.
Things were looking a little touch and go after the first 4 overs. Mis-fields started to rear their ugly head again. Yours truly making a motza of most of the balls fired his way at back stumps. A few dropped catches and near misses kept the game well and truly open for the taking. The next 4 overs saw things improve slightly. The Regs were hungry for points and continued to keep their run rate at an annoying level. Leaving themselves with a do-able target and us with few questions to be answered. Fortunately everyone answered with exceptional second overs. Lessons had been learnt and we applied the torch to their batting. Keeping them extremely accounttable on all but a few balls. gLOVE had the unfortunate task of bowling to a madman on the high of a power over. You could smell this guys testosterone. He was out to win at all costs. I admire that.
The history books will note that we beat them by 20. Because we did.
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8 comments:
Fucking Toto?
Does anyone else know section 3.3 of the ICC code?
I think it definitely applies in this case.
ah the old 3.3 yes i know it well. shame knicky shame.
Section 3.3 provides that slappers are barred from:
Using language or gestures that offends, insults, humiliates, intimidates, threatens, disparages or vilifies another person on the basis of that person's race, religion, gender, colour, descent, or national or ethic origin.
I dont think this sort of bunkum is at issue if we are talking about our own team though.
Out of Africa.... enough said
check out john's photo. name on shirt is gold.
Ha,ha,ha,ha. Kean eye skip!
Section 3.3 clearly indicates that there is no problem in me using language or gestures that offends, insults, humiliates, threatens, disparages or vilifies any kpok biter that listens to Toto.
And don't get all 'I don't believe in capital punishment' on my bad ass Glove.
ok...ok yeah the rain did fall fuckin hard in Africa...FUCKIN HAAAARD !!! and next to a hot blonde 'that I was on a blind date' with...(no runs...rain delayed play..)so give me some pitchslack. I will return after safari, with avengence. K6
whatever u ROSANNA singin fuckin mincer
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